Today has been an emotional day for basketball fans as it is the birthday of Kobe Bryant. Kobe tragically passed away alongside his daughter in a helicopter crash back in January, and basketball fans are still in shock and pain over what happened. Today, Kobe would have turned 42 and to celebrate his big day, there has been an outpouring of tributes in his honor.

Perhaps the biggest tribute of them all came from his wife Vanessa who has been incredibly strong throughout the grieving process. Today, she took to Instagram with a heartbreaking message in which she wishes Kobe a happy birthday. Throughout her post, she claims that she wishes she was the one who passed away first and that she just wants her husband and daughter back.

“To my baby~ Happy birthday. I love you and miss you more than I can ever explain. I wish you and Gigi were here to celebrate YOU! I wish I could make you your fav food or a birthday cake with my Gigi,” Bryant wrote. “I miss your big hugs, your kisses, your smile, your loud ass deep laugh. I miss teasing you, making you laugh and bursting your bubble. I miss you sitting on my lap like my big baby that you are. I think about your tenderness and patience all the time. I think about everything you would do in situations to help me deal with everything thrown my way.”

Vanessa has shown a lot of courage over the last few months, and you can only hope that she and the rest of the family is doing alright. Hopefully, the family can find comfort in knowing just how many people loved the Lakers legend.